Zachary: Hiya! Zach ‘n’ Logan here, for our first joint post in weeks. The Woman Upstairs has been on deadline for approximately *checks watch* forever, so the tumblr’s been a wee bit quiet.
Logan: but that’s changing NOW.
Zachary: Aye, because we have a mission.
Logan: as you may know, nominations for YA Sisterhood’s Crush Tournament
open tomorrow, June 15 are now open. last year, through the magic of Team Kilt, Zach almost won the whole freaking thing, even though he started out as the LOWEST SEED.
of course, as wise man Ricky Bobby once said…
Logan: …but lots of people feel like Zach won their hearts or whatever.
Zachary: A’right, stop now.
Logan: ok. anyway, i guess we’re both eligible to be in it this year, but that’s not what this post is about. we want to make sure that the 2012 tourney is just as cool and casual and above all, FUN as it was last year.
Zachary: We asked ourselves, “What can we do? More incentives, tweets, giveaways?”
Logan: no way. soon it’d be like Christmas, all commercialized ‘n’ shit, and way more stressful than fun.
Zachary: All about living up to other people’s expectations.
Logan: we knew we had to do something DIFFERENT. think OUTSIDE the box.
Zachary: To that end, we’d like you to nominate my best mate, Martin Connelly, for the Crush Tournament.
Logan: for American audiences, “mate” means friend.
Zachary: I think they know that.
Logan: well, it’s KIND of an important point, since Martin is gay, and last time everyone checked (in SHINE) you are not.
Zachary: True. Martin’s gay, and completely out, hence the name of our Crush Tourney campaign:
Logan: for American audiences, “oot” is Scots for out. (see what we did there?)
Zachary: Now, you could nominate Martin just because it’d be brilliant to have a gay character of either sex in the Crush Tournament. It’d shake things up, start people talking—
Logan: get more page views for the tourney.
Zachary: That, too. But Martin wouldn’t want to be nominated ONLY because he likes the lads. He’d want to be there on his own merits.
Logan: um, are you sure he cares how he gets in? sure you’re not confusing him with YOU, the dude who wants to be crushed on for MORE than the kilt and the accent?
Zachary: Perhaps. I’ll go and ask him.
Logan: while Zach’s gone, i’ll point out that June is LGBT Pride month here in America, and that even though more books these days (like SHINE) feature gay secondary characters, fewer than 1 percent actually have LGBT main characters. (Malindo Lo crunched the numbers last year—check it out, she has CHARTS!)
i’m not saying a gay character in a crush tourney would be a GIANT LEAP for equality, but hey, it might be a tiny step. or at least be kinda interesting. and if there ends up being a charity involved, the $$ would definitely go to an equality-fighting-for organization. edited to add: it’d be Human Rights Campaign, or specifically, Marylanders for Marriage Equality, TWU’s personal favorite. right now they’re battling a ballot referendum in my/her home state of Maryland, a referendum that would overturn the legislature’s marriage equality bill this year.
Zachary: OK, I’m back. Martin said aye.
Logan: aye to what?
Zachary: Dunno. He was mostly asleep.
Logan: does he, at this moment, have “pillow-touseled hair” like you’re famous for?
Zachary: Shut up. Yes, he does.
*turns to audience*
So why does Martin deserve your nomination? If you’ve read SHINE, you know he pretty much saved my sanity after [spoiler removed]. The nightmares were…constant. I couldnae burden my parents—with Dad’s cancer, they needed me to be the strong one.
Talking of which, Martin’s helped out, there, too. Caring for a parent with terminal illness is unbelievably exhausting. I’m not complaining, because it’s much better than the alternative, but if you’ve not been through it, you can’t imagine what a relief it is to have one or two nights off a week. Mum and I would go out to dinner, and when we’d come home, Dad and Martin would always be laughing (Martin’s funniest when Mum’s not about and he can use all the profanity in his awe-inspiring arsenal).
Logan: so Martin lives with you and your family, then.
Zachary: Right, so he’s quite like a brother to me.
Logan: what else should we know about him?
Zachary: Well, Martin’s a proud Ned, and his patter will make yer heid spin.
Logan: for American audiences, a “Ned” is a Non-Educated Delinquent, kinda like a hooligan but not always a criminal, and “patter” is like trash-talking, only more clever. and “yer heid” = your head. ok, what else?
Zachary: He’s fluent in Scottish Gaelic. That’s how we met, in primary school at Sgoil Ghàidhlig Ghlaschu (Glasgow Gaelic School). And he’s a Jags supporter, like me, so he’s all aboot the underdog.
Logan: for American audience, Jags are a Glasgow football team that sucks.
Logan: OK, dude, so we now know why Martin is a cool guy and an awesome friend. but this isn’t a Best Friend Tournament. so put on your girl glasses for a sec, and explain why he’s crush-worthy.
Zachary: Ah. Some fancy the fact he’s a ginger.
Logan: *translates* that means he has red hair.
Zachary: He’s got some slick dance moves. Here’s a video of us from a few years ago. I’m in the center, Martin’s on the left, and Graham’s on the right. (There’s also a brief, bizarre appearance by Frankie, which is hard to explain.)
Logan: Martin likes the spanking. INTERESTING. hey, how come he has brown hair there?
Zachary: He had a phase in his early teens when he was bullied for being a ginger (and for his Irish heritage), so he changed the colour. Also, for a reason I can’t recall, he wanted to be known as “El Rocco”.
Logan: ok, gimme another crush-worthy fact. GO!
Zachary: Martin is 18, which, I believe, is significant to older American women.
Logan: yeah, they like the reduced perv factor. the big question, though: IS MARTIN HOT?
Zachary: Nice one.
Logan: speaking of Scotland, what else does Martin have that people from other countries might find attractive?
Zachary: *sighs* He has the accent, ten times stronger than mine, since he’s never left Glasgow.
Zachary: Really? We have to go there again?
Logan: do you want him in or not?
Zachary: A’right….Martin has been known, on occasion, to wear a kilt.
Logan: YES! nothing brings in votes like the k-word.
Zachary: Anyway, we’ve blethered long enough. I hope our words have convinced youse to nominate Martin for this tournament on Friday, June 15. We’ll add a link to this post the moment their nomination form goes live.***
Logan: WAIT, you forgot the most important part. the INCENTIVE. lemme tell them!
if Martin gets into the Crush Tourney, HE WILL JOIN TWITTER and hang out with us for at least one SHADEboys chat.
Zachary: And we will apply to be his advocates.
Logan: ok, time to wrap this up. Z, send us out with the campaign slogan.
Zachary: VOTE MARTIN CONNELLY, ‘cos crushes aren’t just for lasses.
***secretly edited by Logan to add: just because we’re campaigning/advocating for Martin doesn’t mean you shouldn’t also nominate Zachary. he is, after all, the original KILT in TEAM KILT. here’s the direct link for nominating—now go, go, nominate Martin and Zachary, Zachary and Martin! from SHADE! you can remember that, right?? have an awesome weekend, and thanks.
crap, i forgot—the Woman Upstairs has a Crush Tourney post with a book giveaway and a signup form, so you can join Team Kilt and get in on all of the crazy-ass, um, craziness. TRUST ME, it is going to be EPIC.
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